


Blown By The Wind

by monicasanoli



Series: Kelly [2]
Category: 30 Seconds to Mars, Original Work
Genre: F/M, Heavy Angst, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Originally Posted on Tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-01
Updated: 2018-03-01
Packaged: 2019-03-25 14:21:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13836585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/monicasanoli/pseuds/monicasanoli
Summary: Being that far from him had never felt so bad.





	1. Part I

**Author's Note:**

> Prepare yourself for tons, I mean TONS of angst.

It seemed like she had just closed her eyes when her mobile rang on her nightstand, bringing her back to reality all too fast.

“Hm,” she tried to speak, too drunk with sleep to open her eyes. She hadn’t bother to check the caller ID, because she was sure it was Tobias, too excited with the concert he had probably finished hours ago to realize she would be in bed by then.

“K-Kelly?” The broken husky voice woke her up almost immediately, her suddenly active brain working faster than the rest of her body. 

“Shannon? Is that you?” She asked, pulling herself to a sitting position.

“Yeah.” He swallowed hard and she new something wasn’t right. “I'm… I’m so sorry I called you… but…”

“Woa, calm down. What’s happened? Is everyone okay?”

When she realized he was crying, all possible reasons for that started to flood her brain and she caught herself expecting the worse. Shannon hardly ever cried, unless he was too high or drunk, and even then she had never seen him cry that hard.

“Hey, talk to me,” she insisted in the midst of his sobbing. “Is everyone okay? Are you hurt?”

“No… I’m not…” he took a deep breath to control himself and then another one.

“Yeah, breathe… yeah… there you go. Try to stay calm, babe. Now tell me what’s happened. Take your time, I’m here for you.” She could tell he wasn’t just drunk calling because he missed her. He hadn’t done that in a very long time and when he used to do it his routine was totally different. Slowly, he talked.

“I don’t know if you know about it… I’m dating.”

“I heard, yeah,” she smiled, “a Russian girl?”

“Yeah… Jeannine.” His voice was so low she had to press the mobile against her ear to understand the name.

“That’s really great, Shan.”

“I think you would really like her.”

“I don’t think I need to like her, do I?”

“No, you don’t,” he sighed. “This is so fucked up, Kelly! I know we’re not each other’s business anymore and I’m fine with that, but I need my friend. Just for once… just now. Jared is too worried about covering everything up and… no- no one would understand. No one but you.” The pang in her heart was too hard to ignore. She covered her eyes with her hand and nodded.

“Go on.”

“Jeannine was pregnant and she lost the baby.” Shannon said it all in the same breath and Kelly had such a hard time processing that she didn’t say anything for several seconds. “Kelly?” He called after a while.

“Yeah, I’m still here.” Her voice was almost a whisper. “I’m sorry, I… is… I… is she alright?”

“She’s at the hospital. The doctors are saying she will have to stay here for a few days.”

Several questions were forming in her mind, but she didn’t want to ask any of them. She didn’t even know how to. Being that far from him had never felt so bad. She was powerless on the other side of the world and she hated it. Making up her mind in an instant, she got out of bed, went to the closet and started to pull out some clothes, all while still talking to him and trying to keep her voice as reassuring as possible.

“How long have you been in the hospital?”

“I don’t know… since yesterday morning, I guess.”

“Have you eaten? Have you slept?”

“No. I think I’ve just been drinking coffee from the vending machine here.”

“Where is Jared?”

“Hm… Tokio? I’m not sure.”

“Your mom?”

“Here in LA, but…” he sighed, “she doesn’t approve of Jeannine, so she… came here yesterday and left.”

“What?!” Kelly stopped in the middle of putting a pair of jeans inside a small suitcase. If there was one person who would do absolutely anything to support Shannon, that person was Constance. Not even Jared would go so far, and Kelly had learned that by experience. Something had gone very wrong back in LA.

“It’s a long story.”

“Yeah, I bet. Look, go home, clean up and get some rest. I’ll get in the first flight out possible. Do you have food in your house? Well, whatever, eat something! Order some food, I don’t know. Just promise me you will eat?”

“I promise… but I didn’t mean for that… you don’t have to come all this way.”

“I don’t mind.”

“But I do! I don’t want to cause any trouble, I just wanted to talk to you…”

“Shannon, you can’t expect me to stay here listening to you crying after everything you had just told me. I don’t care about what has happened between us, I don’t care how many times we have fought, right now I’m your friend, remember? That is what you wanted, right?”

He was sobbing again and she could feel her heart aching for him. Despite all the things they had been through, all the trouble he had caused, he was one of the best people she had ever known. He deserved to be happy, and if she had to fly all the way to Los Angeles just to hold his hand during this hard time, that’s exactly what she was going to do.

“Thank you, Kelly,” he cried. “My god, I don’t deserve you.”

“It’s alright. Just hang tight, okay? I’ll probably just get there tomorrow night.”

“She was seven months pregnant, Kelly.”

“Oh my god, Shannon,” she whispered.

“We had… there was a crib, a room almost ready and everything.”

“Oh baby, hold on. Just wait for me, please. Go home, eat, rest and-”

“Don’t do anything stupid,” he finished for here with a soft chuckle. “I won’t. I promise.”

Kelly was crying herself when she disconnected the call, but she didn’t let it stop her. Controlling her emotions, she texted her friend Camila, “Shannon needs help. I’m flying in, should be there tomorrow night. PLEASE keep an eye on him? He needs to eat!” It was 4:30am I Germany, Tobias was about 100km away from her, in Giessen. He had played the last Avantasia concert without Amanda and she knew that, awake or not, he would be hyped and eager to tell her all about the show. Telling him the news would be like dropping a bucket of ice cold water over him, but it would be better than lying. She wanted to make sure there would be no misunderstandings.

“Hallo?” He mumbled in a tired voice.

“Hey baby, it’s me. I’m sorry to wake you.”

“It’s okay,” he yawned. “Did anything happen?”

“Sort of. I’m going to Los Angeles today… right now, actually.”

“What? Why?”

“Don’t be mad and wait until I’m done talking. Promise?”

“Why do I have the feeling I know where this is going?”

“Please, Tobi!”

“Fine.”

“Shannon’s girlfriend lost their baby. She was seven months pregnant, apparently. Can you imagine that?” She heard his heavy sigh on the other end.

“And what kind of monster would I be if I asked you not to go?” She was too used to his bad mood to get offended.

“Exactly. Hey, I know you hate this and I’ll be back as soon as possible. Do you trust me?”

“Of course, Kelz.”

“I love you, Tobi.”

“I know. Be safe!”

Out of her pajamas, her hair up in a bun, Kelly left for the airport.


	2. Part II

Camila had showed up the day before with pots and pans full of food. “I don’t know what this is all about and I don’t want to. Kelly has asked me to feed you, so that’s what I’m doing,” she had said before he got the chance to say hi. “Now I don’t know how you feel about Brazilian cuisine,” she continued, walking past him and into his house, headed for the kitchen, “but my mom is spending the month here with us, so you, my friend, are about to taste the most delicious food ever!” She had smiled at him, putting everything she had brought inside the fridge. He knew her well enough not to refuse her help, so he had just smiled back and leaned against the counter, watching her.

“Thanks, Cam.”

It was hard for her to ignore the deep, dark circles under his eyes and his expression of complete despair, but she held her tongue until the very last minute. When she was done with the food, however, she saw he had his eyes fixed on the table between them and his pain was so obvious that she couldn’t control herself any longer.

“You look terrible. Wanna talk?”

“I'm… sorry, Cam. I…” he tried to speak, but the words wouldn’t come out, so he just hung his head, tired of trying to make sense.

“It’s okay,” she hugged him tight wishing she could do more. “Kelly will be here soon. Whatever the problem is, she’ll make it better, won’t she?” Cam felt his shoulders moving when he chuckled a little.

“She always does,” he answered under his breath when he released her.

“Just make sure you eat, will you?” She got her car keys from the table. “I was serious about my mom’s cooking.”

“I will, don’t worry,” he smiled.

“And try to get some sleep.”

“Yeah. Thanks again. Say hi to Chris and Sarah for me.”

The mere mention of his friend’s daughter had the knot in his throat growing bigger. He had had everything planned, for the first time in his life. The minute Jeannine had told him she was pregnant, he had started getting his act together. He had been getting healthier and healthier, drinking less, working out, not even considering taking his pills again. Thinking about stepping out of the limelight, he had bought an apartment in Seattle and had been spending more and more time there as Jeannine’s pregnancy had advanced. He had been planning on reaching out to Kelly; if he could show her how much he had changed, he was sure he would get her friendship back.

He never knew how much time he had spent sitting on the floor of his living room with his back against the door after Camila had left. Eventually he had stopped crying, not because he hadn’t felt like it anymore, but because his body was so weak, it just had to stop. When that happened, he had forced himself up and into the kitchen through the darkness that had fallen inside the house. He honestly couldn’t remember the last time he had eaten. He had been sure he would throw up anything he dared put in his stomach. Much to his surprise, the first bite from Cam’s mom’s lasagna had done the trick of awakening his hunger, making him eat half of the tray. He hadn’t been able to taste anything, though.

Now he was just laying on his bed after god only knew how many hours of falling in and out of nightmares. He kept checking his phone for news from the hospital or Kelly, but time didn’t make sense anymore.


	3. Part III

The house was covered in darkness, not even the front yard light was on, and the trees around it only made the night seem deeper on that part of the street. The driver looked out the window with raised eyebrows.

“Are you sure you are staying here, miss?”

“Yeah. Thanks.” She got her suitcase and walked to the gate hoping Shannon hadn’t changed its code. He hadn’t and she looked up, unsuccessfully trying to see something through his bedroom window. The curtains were drawn, one might even think he wasn’t home. But his car was on the driveway, so she crossed the yard to the front door and rang the bell, her heart beating faster when the sound echoed loudly inside.

“Oh come on, Shan. Don’t tell me you’re not here,” she mumbled when a whole minute went by with no sign of him.

She was already scrolling for his number when the door suddenly opened, revealing a bearded, head shaved Shannon with huge, baggy, dark circles under his eyes, made worse by the light coming from her mobile. He looked terrible, but it didn’t stop her from stepping forward and locking him tight in a hug that she hoped would make him feel safe.

“Thank you, thank you,” he kept breathing on her neck, holding her just as tight.

“I’m here, baby,” she whispered trying to hold her tears back. “You’ll be fine, you’ll see. I promise I’ll take care of it.”

He released her a little, only to hold her face in between his huge, calloused hands and lean his forehead against hers.

“I don’t deserve you,” he swallowed hard, tears already falling down his face, “I’ve never had.”

“Shhhh… don’t say that. Look at me,” she put her own hands against his cheeks, forcing him to raise his head and open his eyes. The sadness that has always lived there stared back at her, only ten times bigger and her heart sank. “Let me take care of you.”

Slowly, he nodded and rubbed his tears away. She let him take her bag and closed the door, following him upstairs. There was a dim light coming from his room, but the rest of the house was just as buried in shadows as its exterior was. He seemed to be using all of his energy to climb the stairs, which said more about his state than she would have liked to know.

“There are fresh linens in the closet, if you want to change those,” he entered one of his guest rooms and put her suitcase next to the bed as she flicked the light on.

“Why are you putting me in a guest room?” She blinked a few times to adjust her eyes.

“I just figured you wouldn’t want to be in the same room.”

Her lips curled a little and she shook her head. “I don’t think you should be alone right now. Besides, we have a lot to talk about, don’t we?” He kept staring at the floor near her feet, but he nodded his agreement and she decided not to push. “Do you want me to sleep here? I mean, if you are not comfortable…” 

“No!” His eyes darted to her. “No,” he repeated more calmly. “I don’t want to be alone anymore.”

Kelly agreed and turned to go to the last room down the hall. He followed her and gently caught her hand mid air when she was about to turn on the main lights there as well.

“Can we just keep that one on?” He indicated the bedside lamp that shed a strong but restricted brightness on the room. “Headache.”

“Sure. Let me just change and we’ll talk.”

She got a pair of sweatpants from her suitcase and went into his bathroom. It was true she was dying to take those jeans off after spending hours sitting on them inside an airplane, but she also needed to check his medicine cabinet for anything that could be dangerous for him. Being careful not to make any characteristic noise, she opened the little door and peeked inside, but the strongest thing she found there was a bottle of aspirin. “Ah, thank god,” she sighed in relief and turned to inspect the rest of the bathroom. There was nothing unusual but hair products and bottles of lotion for women. She let a tired smile curl her lips, turning to face the big mirror next to the door. Shannon had a girlfriend, she thought as she stared at her own reflection. She needed to start getting used to that fact, but why was it so strange? She couldn’t possibly be jealous. But there was a funny feeling in her gut. “Whatever, Kelly, that’s not why you’re here,” she told herself.

Deciding she had been there long enough, she quickly changed her pants and went back to the room. Shannon had cuddled up on his side of the bed and was looking at her like he was surprised to see her there.

“I’m not using anything,” he stated, letting her know he was well aware of what she had been doing in the bathroom.

“I had to check for myself,” she shrugged sitting under the blankets by his side.

“I know.”

There was a moment of awkward silence before she took his hand on hers and squeezed it a little. “Do you want to tell me what’s happened?”

“Jeannine was diagnosed with a condition called preeclampsia. It’s um… a malformation of blood vessels that are supposed to send blood to the placenta, something like that. It was one of those things, you know. One day everything was normal, then the next day it all started to go wrong. She had one of her prenatals scheduled for that afternoon, but she woke up with horrible cramps, throwing up all over… it was horrible. I drove her up to the ER and when the doctors checked her up they saw her blood pressure was up the roof; it had gone up, you know, just like that,” he snapped his fingers, “overnight. As she had passed the 24th week and her condition was severe, they had to induce labor. She was so fucking scared… and there was nothing I could do to help her.”

As he talked he had intertwined his fingers with hers and was now staring at their hands with a confused look. She guessed the rest of the story, but asked him to continue anyway. “What happened next?”

He blinked out of his daze and organized his thoughts again. “Jeannine was so scared, her body couldn’t take it anymore. With her unconscious they had to perform a C-section, but…” his voice started to break. “Andrew… he… our son was already dead by the time they delivered him. They call that stillbirth. It’s a horrible word.”

Kelly felt her own tears falling when he started crying again. She moved closer and let him lay his head on her shoulder, her whole body shaking with the force of his sobs and she tried to soothe him.

“How is Jeannine? Have you seen her yet?” She asked after he calmed down a little.

“They didn’t want to discharge her, she is still too weak. Her body was pushed to it’s limits and beyond, even.” He answered without moving from her shoulder.

“Where is her family?”

“She doesn’t have any family here, her mother is coming from Russia.”

“And your family? Why the hell are they not here with you?”

“Jared’s busy, you know, being Jared.”

“But your mom…”

“Mom thinks Jeannine is trying to take advantage of me, so she said she wanted nothing to do with the pregnancy or the baby.”

“Oh no!” She pushed him to sit up and look at her. “Constance didn’t say that. That’s impossible! Why would she?”

“Kelly, Jeannine was a prostitute,” Shannon admitted, searching her face for a reaction she was fighting not to show. “We’ve met at a club. That’s why my mom refuses to accept her.”

“Well, she’s got a point there, hasn’t she?” But seeing the way he was looking at her she quickly added, “but of course, she’s your mom. She was supposed to support you no matter what. I mean.. her first grandson!” She sighed. “Anyway, I’m sure Jeannine is a nice girl.”

He scoffed, “no, you are not. But she is! If you would just meet her… she wasn’t on the streets because she had nothing better to do, you know.”

“I know! I know… I’m sorry I said it like that. I would really like to meet her.”

Silence fell between them once again and during those minutes Shannon just played with the hem of his t-shirt, his eyes going in and out of focus under Kelly’s watch. To say that she was surprised was an understatement; everything that Shannon had said had her so disoriented that she didn’t know where to start processing. Except for his girlfriend being a prostitute - that was more than expected coming from him.

“No,” she thought, closing her eyes to censure her judgement. She had to be better than that if she wanted to help him.

“Andrew. It’s a beautiful name.”

“His room was almost ready back in Seattle,” he smiled seeing her frown. “I’ve bought an apartment there; we’ve been spending most of our time up there, you know, away from…” he raised his hands to encompass his surroundings, “all of this… LA. Actually, we were coming here only when she had to see the doctor.”

Kelly was nodding. “I’m so proud of you.”

“I was already planning on getting in touch with you again. I’d expected the circumstances to be better, but… I wanted to make things right. I wanted my best friend back. When Jeannine told me she was pregnant I almost panicked, but then I asked myself “what would Kelly tell me to do?” and suddenly it was all clear.”

“Shut up,” she laughed.

“I’m serious! I’ve decided to man up, face my problems, stop fooling around… have a family. All because you kept saying the right things inside my head.”

“That was just your conscience,” Kelly grinned. “But I’m flattered to hear it has my voice.”

His laughter filled the room for the first time in days. “How could it not?” He reached for her hand and squeezed it. “Do you think we can do this? Being just friends?”

“I hope so, Shan. I really do.” She covered their hands with her free one, “I’ve missed your friendship too. Sometimes things happen and my first reaction is to text you and tell you all about it, and then I remember I can’t.”

“Yeah, I know all about that.” He bit his bottom lip before asking,” was Tobias okay with you coming and all?”

“No, but he understood. I guess.”

Shannon let go of her hand to soften the pillows before lying down. “I wish we got along… he and I.” Kelly was so startled by his confession that she didn’t hear when he asked her if they could turn off the light.

“Kelly?” He insisted, touching her arm.

“Huh?”

“Can we just sleep? I’m exhausted.”

“Oh, sure.” She flicked the switch on the bedside lamp and got under the blankets. “Goodnight,” she squeezed his shoulders briefly and turned to the other side.

Her mobile said it was 3am there. Back home, in Germany, it should be past lunch time. She quickly texted Tobias, hoping he would reply right away. “Got here safe, but things are really bad. I wish you were here with me. Love you, baby.”

His reply dinged less than a minute later. “Funny thing, I wish YOU were here. Glad you are okay, though. Love you too.”

She smiled at his sarcasm and fell asleep the moment her eyes closed.


	4. Part IV

When Shannon woke up the next day, he was alone in bed. He rolled under the blankets to lay on his back and stare at the ceiling while he tried to remember the dream he’d had. Kelly had been there. That was so improbable he scoffed and shook his head to remind himself of it. Kelly was halfway across the world, as far from him as she could be. But in his dream she had hugged him so tight and they had cried together. That had felt so real it was even painful to think of.

No, he needed a shower. He needed to stop thinking about Kelly and go to the hospital, where Jeannine needed him. Rubbing his eyes, he dragged himself to the bathroom and took his time under the hot water. He made a mental list of everything he had to do - check on Jea, try to get her home, check with the hospital if they could release Andrew’s body, arrange for his remains to be cremated, pick Jea’s mom from the airport…

Fuck, that was too much. He just wanted to stay in that room forever, why couldn’t he just stay there where he was safe? The mere thought of driving to the hospital was making his guts feel like liquid, and suddenly he couldn’t breathe or stand anymore.

He let his body fall on the tiled floor and that was where his grief caught up to him. The tears burnt in his eyes, but were soon washed away by the water falling over him. The struggle to breathe and cry at the same time exhausted him and his hollering muffled the loud bangs on the door. Now he was hearing Kelly shouting along with him, she was yelling his name, calling him from God knows where. He was losing his mind.

“Shannon! Shannon, please!” His vision was all blurred, but it was her, alright. She was kneeling in front of him, cupping his face with her hands, making him look at her. She was there, turning the water off and wrapping a towel around his shoulders.

“Shhhh… it’s okay,” she was whispering into his ear as she hugged him.

“Why am I still dreaming?” He thought he sounded like a schoolboy, but he didn’t care. “Why are you hunting me?” 

“Oh babe, I’m not. You called me, remember? You asked me to come and help you.” She pulled the towel tighter around his shoulders. “You are not dreaming,” she assured him.


	5. Part V

The smell of coffee seemed to be doing good for both of them. Shannon definitely looked calmer now. He’d given her quite a scare and she had only left him alone for thirty minutes to set up their breakfast before she would go and wake him up. She knew he was ashamed, he didn’t even want to look at her, but she needed him to cooperate.

“These cheese buns are good, huh?” She helped herself to one more. “I didn’t know Cam could make these.”

“It was her mom,” he corrected, eyes fixed on his coffee.

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah, she’s visiting. Cam brought food for an entire army.”

Kelly nodded. One more reason not to ask her friend for more help. She didn’t want to spoil their family time.

“So I think we should go to the hospital. What do you say?” His eyes darted to her and she saw he was terrified. “Hey, I know you are scared, but we have to go. You do want me to meet Jeannine, don’t you?” He swallowed hard and looked around the kitchen for an excuse. “She needs you, Shan. Be brave for her, please.” Her hands went to his one more time, squeezing them for emphasis.

“Okay,” his voice was so hoarse that it barely came out, but it was enough for her.

As she drove his car she kept throwing glances at him, shrinking over the passenger seat. How could such a big guy become so small? Her heart was breaking for him and she knew the only way she would be able to help him would be to face that like a job. If she didn’t keep her mind focused, her feelings would cloud her judgment and more people would suffer. Concentrating on the road ahead, she made a list of everything she had to do, and when she parked his car her determination was so obvious that Shannon had no choice but to follow suit.

“Hi, we are here to see Miss Jeannine… um,” she turned to Shannon.”

“Burnaeva.” The nurse recognized him right away.

“Right this was, Mr. Leto. She has been asking about you.” They followed her through one of the hallways and stopped in front of a door. “You can go in. Take your time, she needs a friendly face.”

Shannon turned to Kelly, but she just gestured him to go without her. “I want to have a word with the doctor first,” she smiled reassuringly and watched him go to the girl that was lying on the hospital bed, looking at them with confusion written all over her face. When he sat by her side Kelly turned to the nurse.

“My name is Kelly Taylor, I’m his assistant,” she nodded at him through the glass. “Can I talk to her doctor?”

“Of course, Miss Taylor, if you could just wait here by the nurse station, please.”

Kelly followed her further down the hall, where she could still see inside the room. While she waited for the doctor, she called Emma and asked if she could borrow one of the drivers Jared had under his pay roll. Much to her surprise, her friend sighed an apology and said Jared would kill her if he found out.

“Are you kidding me, Emma? It’s for Shannon!”

“I know, that’s exactly the point.”

“Do you even know what’s happening? Is this really the time to be teaching him a lesson?!”

“I’m sorry, Kelly. I really am. Good luck.” Emma hang up on her, leaving her glued to the floor. Were these people serious?

“Miss Taylor?” A smart looking doctor was standing in front of her. She blinked her confusion away before focusing on him. “I’m Dr. Mathison, nice to meet you.”

She shook his hand. “Nice to meet you, doctor. So, how is Jeannine?”

“Physically, she is recovering as fast as it can be expected. Mentally, however… um, she needs to be around her loved ones, but she has to grief. Losing a child is always a hard blow and different people react in different ways. But one way or the other, the grieving period needs to be respected. I understand she doesn’t have family here in the US?”

“Yes, but her mother is flying in today.”

“Good. The more you can keep an eye on the both of them, the better.”

“Doctor… will she ever be able to have kids?”

“Yes, but she would have to be monitored very closely. I can give you some brochures, there are many support groups and counseling for women and couples who go through the same situation.”

“Please, I’d like that.” She shifted uncomfortably. “About the remains…”

“They have been cleared for release. We just need one of them to sign the documents. And, if you don’t mind, I would like to keep her here to run some final tests, but she should be discharged by the end of the day.”

“Fine, no problem. I need to run some errands, can he stay in her room?”

“Sure. Her visiting hours are not restricted.”

“Excellent. Thanks, doctor.”

As he walked away, Kelly approached the door and just stood there, looking at the couple in front of her. All of Shannon’s anxiety and fears seemed to have disappeared at the sight of his weak and fragile girlfriend. He had his back to her, all his attention focused on the big blue eyes staring lovingly at him. There was something real between them, alright. Kelly stepped in slowly and cleared her throat to announce her presence. Shannon got up and turned to face her.

“Kelly, I want you to meet Jeannine, my girlfriend.” She didn’t know how to react, but she let him pull her closer to the bed. “Jea, baby, this is Kelly.”

Her big blue eyes scanned Kelly’s face dreamily and she spoke in a tiny yet firm voice. “It’s very nice to finally meet you, Kelly.”

“You too. How are you feeling?”

“Fine,” she shrugged and looked around the room, as if she didn’t know where she was.

“Shannon,” Kelly turned to him, “I spoke to the doctor, he thinks she can be discharged later today.” He smiled, visibly relaxed. “And Andrew’s remains are cleared as well, you just have to sign some papers. Last night you said something about her mother… do you know what time she lands?”

He rubbed his eyes, trying to remember. “3pm, I guess?”

“What’s her name?”

“Yulia,” Jeannine spoke next to them. “She lands at 2:45.”

Kelly nodded, “perfect. I will arrange for her to be picked up and brought here.”

“Where are you going?” Shannon asked when she walked to the door.

“I have some things to do. Call me if you need anything.” She walked away before he could protest.


	6. Part VI

The house was so well hidden by the woods that at first Kelly thought she’d got the address wrong. However, as soon as she got out of the car and walked further down the path, the dogs started barking and a pretty elderly woman came right after them. Her long, white hair braided to the side.

“Kelly,” Constance acknowledged with a warm smile and turned around, gesturing Kelly to follow her inside. They sat down at the kitchen table, where tea was served for two.

“Oh, I didn’t know you were expecting someone. I can come back another time.” Kelly glanced at the table and started to get up. 

“Nonsense, sit down,” Constance moved her hand as if she was shooing a fly away and Kelly did as she said. “I was about to have some tea when I heard the car, so I just put another cup on the table. People don’t usually come all this way by mistake, you know.” She was already pouring hot water into the two cups, so Kelly didn’t think it was a good idea to remind her that she didn’t really like tea.

“Well, I hope you don’t mind me coming unannounced, but I think we need to talk about Shannon.”

“Yeah, let’s go straight to the point, why don’t we?” Constance rested her chin on her left hand and curled her lips in a way that wasn’t entirely meant to be nice. The resemblance between her and Jared was so obvious it had Kelly feeling uncomfortable. She swallowed hard and forced a smile herself.

“I just need to understand why you are doing this to him.”

Constance leaned back on her chair and sighed. “Do you plan on having children yourself, Kelly?”

“What does that have to do with-”

“Just answer my question.” There it was, Jared’s temper.

“Yes… I guess, yes. Why?”

“So then you will know how hard it is to just sit back and watch them make a fool of themselves over and over again.” She sipped her tea ever so casually and Kelly’s patience started to run out.

“What do you mean?”

“Do you think I’m blind? Do you think I’m stupid? I know who my boys hang with! But I never really cared, because I trusted they would never make a mistake too big or too permanent to fix. And then there was you,” she pointed her index finger at Kelly. “You came into our lives and you made Shannon feel safe. You made him fall for you so blindly that we all thought he had found the one.”

“Come on, don’t blame this on me.” Kelly couldn’t believe her ears.

“Where were you when he was crying for you?” Constance raised her voice. “Where were you when he met that disgusting Russian prostitute?”

“Constance!” Kelly got to her feet, followed by her ex-mother-in-law.

“You left! You ran to that ex of yours as you left him behind to stumble across that filth he impregnated. Have you even met her?”

“Yes! And it doesn’t matter who she was before she met him, because she makes him happy! Don’t you care about that?”

“So happy she convinced him to move to Seattle,” Constance scoffed.

“Oh, please! Shannon is big enough to make his own decisions. Don't you get it, Constance? Are you so proud of who you are that you can’t see what is happening to him? When Jeannine got pregnant he could have denied paternity, he could have forced her to have an abortion, all things I’m sure Jared has done before, but he chose to be a father! He chose to built himself a family and face his responsibilities. Can’t you see that that is why he bought that apartment in Seattle? Can you blame him for wanting to raise his son away from the mayhem that this city is?!” She paced around the kitchen trying to control her breathing, but she just couldn’t calm down after hearing what Constance had to say. “You… your grandson, Constance. How could you do this? You left him… you, Jared, Emma, God knows who else. No wonder Shannon called me, he was terrified, he was all alone.”

“You were the first to turn your back on him, so don’t you-”

“I’m not his family!” Kelly yelled. “As much as I love him, I’m not his family.” She turned and started walking away, but stopped when she reached the door. “I suggest you get off that high Mama Leto horse and start acting like the mother Shannon needs right now. It’s not too late mend things.”

Leaving a dumbfounded Constance behind, surrounded by barely untouched china, Kelly got behind Shannon’s wheels and started driving back to the hospital. Only she was so angry she was sure she was going to crash his car if she didn’t calm down. Besides, she still had to call Jared, and he wouldn’t be such a passive listener as his mother had been. 

The minute she parked at a coffee shop she recognized, her mobile started ringing. She was so surprised it wasn’t Jared that she feared Jeremy would mistake it by disappointment.

“All good, kid. Jamie just called saying he dropped the lady off at the hospital.”

“Have I ever told you how much I love you?” She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.

“Constantly,” his accent made her laugh. “Will you explain later?”

“Absolutely. Thanks for lending me Jamie.”

“Any time. Try to stay out of trouble, will you?”

“I’ll do my best,” she disconnected the call smiling.

Now it was time to call Jared. She realized she didn’t know how to start that conversation when he answered the phone, so she decided to reproduce what he had said to her only a year before.

“I don’t care where you are or what you’re doing. Your brother needs you here. I’m not his family, Jared, I can only help him so far. Stop acting so high and mighty and get your ass back here.” Kelly didn’t leave him the chance to argue.

With a deep breath, she got out of the car and into the coffee shop.


	7. Part VII

Jeannine and her mother were speaking in Russian while Shannon sat on a chair next to the door. The women were sitting on the bed and looked ready to leave. They didn’t seem to notice when Kelly got in, so she just turned to Shannon.

“Hey, what’s going on?” Kelly touched his shoulder. His mind seemed to be someplace else, but he smiled with relief when he looked at her.

“We are just waiting for the doc, but she is ready to leave.”

“Do you understand what they are saying?”

“Not a single word.” Kelly chuckled and rubbed his back.

“I brought you coffee,” she gave him one of the paper cups from the holder and hunched so she could look him in the eyes. “Do you still take it black?”

“Always,” Shannon sipped and kissed her on the cheek. “You’re an angel. Thanks,” he whispered.

That caught the others’ attention and they stopped talking to look at Kelly. Behaving as naturally as she could, she got to her feet, took her own cup from the holder a gave the rest to Jeannine.

“I don’t know if you like coffee, but I figured you shouldn’t be drinking it now. I got the decaf for you and a regular latte for your mom.” Then, turning to the blonde woman, “you must be Yulia. Nice to meet you. My name is Kelly.” They shook hands, but Yulia didn’t say anything.

“My mother doesn’t speak English,” Jeannine explained rather drily and Kelly just nodded. “Thank you for the coffee.”

“Yeah, no problem.” She turned to the door. “I’ll be outside when you’re ready.”

“Kelly, wait!” Shannon followed her out of the room, but she didn’t stop walking until she was out in the parking lot. “Hey, hey.” She let him turn her around by her shoulders so she was facing him. “Why are you crying?”

“I’m not,” she tried to laugh it off, but the tears were already falling. 

“Oh babe. What is it?”

“Just… forget it,” Kelly chuckled, wiping her cheeks. “Really, it doesn’t matter.”

Shannon growled in frustration. “This is ridiculous. Let’s run. Just… disappear. Right now, you and me.”

Kelly just smiled and quietly sipped her coffee. “Go back inside, Shan. I’ll wait in the car.”

“Kelly-”

“Shannon.” She didn’t raise her voice, but her tone was so firm that Shannon stopped. “Go back inside.”

He turned around, dragging his feet back to the hospital. When he was finally out of sight she let out the sobs she had been holding back. Her whole body shaking while she walked to his car. About half an hour later, Shannon showed up with his girlfriend and her mother, holding the door to the backseat of the Rover for them. He sat next to Kelly, eyeing her expectantly while he put his seatbelt on, but she just shook her head and gave him his keys back.

The silence between them was deafening and made worse by the whispers in Russian coming from the back. The 20-minute drive felt like an eternity, until Shannon got to his driveway and Kelly jumped out of the car mumbling something that sounded like “the guest room”. Shannon watched her get inside the house as he helped Jeannine out of the car. He fought against every impulse of running towards Kelly and tried to focus on the girl in front of him.

It was the middle of the night when Kelly finally got out of the room, assuming everybody was asleep, and went to the pool area, sitting over one leg on a chair. Shannon, alone in the dark kitchen, watched her walk by and went after her, grabbing a blanket from his couch before stepping outside.

“You’ll get a cold like this,” he said as he put the blanket around her and kissed the top of her head, moving to sit in front of her. 

“I thought you were sleeping.”

“I can’t. I’ve been sitting in the kitchen for a while. What about you?”

Kelly shrugged. “Too much to think about.”

“You tell me.”

“I went to see your mother today and I called Jared right after.” He raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Yeah. It won’t be a shock if they never send me a Christmas card again. But anyway, I defended you. You should know that.”

“Why are you talking like that?”

“I don’t like Jeannine,” Kelly ignored him. “She hasn’t done anything wrong, but I don’t like her just because she is with you. I’ve had a funny feeling ever since you called me and I was trying to ignore it mostly because I didn’t understand it. But… seeing how she looks at you… and the way she looked at me,” she laughed, “and the way you are looking at me right now. I can’t stay here, Shannon. I can’t be around… you.”

“Because of her?”

“Because of her, because of you, because of me! I’m jealous of you, Shannon! That’s…I can’t allow myself to feel that. And I can’t allow you to hurt her even more. It’s not fair. She doesn’t deserve that, after everything she’s been through. Tobias doesn’t deserve that either.”

“But I told you…”

“That you would like to be friends with him? Seriously? Do you really see that happening?”

Shannon swallowed and stared at his feet, biting his lips.

“We have to be realistic, Shan. I’ve been here for 24 hours and it’s been torture already. It’s not only ourselves that we are hurting.” She leaned closer to him and squeezed his arm for emphasis.

He nodded his head in agreement, but didn’t say anything. Kelly leaned back on her chair with a sigh.

“What I said last night,” she continued, “about us being friends. I’d still very much like that.”

“Except we can never see each other again,” he scoffed.

“Well, do you have a better solution? We already live in two different continents, so avoiding each other won’t exactly be a problem. And we don’t really have the same friends, except for Cam and Jared, right? I hardly ever see your brother, and I only go to Cam’s once a year, which I hear is not something you do.”

“Yeah, fine. I got your point.”

“We can text anytime. You can call me anytime. That has to be enough, Shan.”

He clenched his jaw. “When are you going back?”

“Tomorrow morning.”

“Of course,” he mumbled covering his eyes and staying like that for a while. Kelly was about to get up when he looked at her. “Do you remember when we got together? Like, for real.”

“Yeah. The MTV unplugged rehearsal,” she smiled.

“Do you remember the song Jared was singing?”

“Where the streets have no name,” her smile broadened. “Jared was pissed because you weren’t there, and Emma found us in one of the back rooms.”

“Yeah yeah. But that song… it’s always reminded me of you-”

“That’s natural.”

“- and have you ever paid attention to the lyrics?”

Her heart was heavier than ever. “Of course I have.”

“It really is the perfect song for us.” He gave her a weak smile. “Thank you for coming when I called.”

“Sure.” She got up, still wrapped in his blanket. “I need to at least take a nap before I have to go to the airport, so…”

“Oh, okay. I can drive you there, if you want to.”

She nodded and started walking back to the house, but stopped once she’d reached the glass sliding door. “Actually,” she turned around to look at him, “it’s almost dawn and there are still some of those cheese buns left. Can you make us some coffee?”

Shannon grinned and they both went inside.


End file.
